VOICES ON THE INSIDE

Unapologetic
I used you as my shield,
my cloak of invisibility.
I hid my flashing blue eyes,
my toothy smile all because
I let you.
Shame, fear, guilt
will make a person do
crazy things
to obscure their soul.
Self punishment
just because I lived
and she didn’t.
You don’t have control of me anymore,
it took me 30 years to figure that out.

I REFUSE to live in shame.
I REFUSE to hide who I truly am.
I refuse to be silenced
just because my truth makes you
uncomfortable.
Look at me now,
what do you see?
Do you see my courage?
It’s right there in my chest.
What about my resilience?
I wear it in my smile.
I bet you missed the gentleness
within my hands.
What you will never see again is that
hood of regret my hair once was.
My personal hell has been
cut and shaved
to reveal what a survivor looks like.